I am not sure, but I think I was just interviewed for a job that I didn’t apply for and don’t want. It’s called the Mommy interview – that forced conversation that happens between mothers when the kids are playing nicely or are in the same class at school. It is usually a quick interview, and if the interviewer is skilled (and most of them are), you may not even know that you were being considered for the position. Oh, what is the “position” you ask? It is your (and by “your” I mean you and your child’s) role in the mommy interviewee’s life, i.e., your child can be friends with their child, you can be friends with the mommy interviewee, so that at school functions, birthday parties, and other social events, you can breezily run into each other and have small talk. Sometimes the husbands are dragged into the job too, and the interviewer starts asking questions about your spouse to see if he/she is compatible with their spouse.
Typical Mommy Interview Questions:
1. Do you stay home?
2. What does your husband do?
3. Where does your child go to pre-school?
4. Where do you live?
Blah. Blah. Blah.
I used to play along with the interview, answering vaguely enough to show that we were not mass murders, but refusing to provide any information that would divulge important information about myself. After being interviewed for years, I now find the whole ordeal downright rude and obnoxious. I am all for getting to know the people with whom my children interact, but the superficiality of the mommy interview makes my blood boil especially when it happens over and over with the same moms.
All anyone needs to know is that I am a good mother, who is not afraid to discipline my kids and sometimes I can be a wee bit politically incorrect in my approach. If your kids come to my house, I not only will keep an eye on them, but will make sure that they get outside for fresh air and exercise. I will also make sure that they drink water and eat fruit as part of their snacks. If I hear them saying anything rude or inappropriate, I will pop up unexpectedly and let them know that I doubt their mother would approve (the same way that I don’t approve). I will even try to make sure that they have a good time. While my resume may not appeal to everyone, those in my mommy circle know that they can trust me to watch their kids, just like I know that I can trust them with mine. Anyone who feels the need to interview me every time they see me should probably start looking for another applicant because clearly I am not the right lady for the job!